Protecting My Heart Read online

  Zeke coughed a little. “Remind me to wear my vest.”

  “You’re awake?” Tristan nearly jumped out of his skin.

  “Awake enough to hear you freak out.” Zeke’s voice sounded weak.

  “Please be okay. You have to live through this.”

  “I’ll be fine. I’ve been shot in worse places,” he groaned and tried to reach for Tristan.

  “Are you trying to make a joke?”

  “Maybe.” Zeke laughed lightly. It was a weak sound. Tristan hated it. It sounded like the laugh of a dying man.

  Tristan moved so that Zeke could actually reach him. The hand brushed over his face as he spoke. “I don’t want to hear all the places that you’ve been shot.”

  “Don’t worry, I’ll save you from the details.”

  “There’s an ambulance coming for you.” Tristan kept his hands on the wound, trying to keep the man alive.

  “I know. They usually call one when you get shot.” Zeke smirked with his half-closed eyes.

  “What do I know about being shot?” Tristan shot back. “I’m a baker. Ask me about burns sometime.”

  “Get a lot of them?”

  “Not as bad as getting shot.” Tristan shook his head.

  By this time the paramedics were making their way into the apartment and they were eager to get him patched up well enough to move. Tristan found himself pulled away. He had blood all over his hands and shirt. “Please tell me he’s going to be all right.”

  “He’ll be fine. You can meet us at the hospital if you want to.”

  Tristan sighed. “Can I get a ride?”

  Zeke’s partner placed her hand on Tristan’s shoulder. “I can get you there. We’ll leave these guys to finish up here. It’s going to be fine. Come on, we’ll meet him there.”

  Tristan nodded, letting the detective lead him out of the building and into a car that was sitting practically up on the lawn. She must have been freaking out enough that she wasn’t caring how she parked. “Do you drive like a maniac every day?”

  “I’m better at it than Zeke,” she smirked and climbed behind the wheel as Tristan moved to the passenger seat.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Zeke’s eyes fluttered open and he looked around the room that he was in. The stark white walls lacked all personality, but the flowers that sat on the particle board night table were pretty. And there was someone sleeping in the chair next to him.

  He slowly dragged himself to a sitting position to get a better look at the man in the hospital chair.

  “Tristan.”

  Tristan jumped awake.

  “You’re awake!” he shouted causing the nurses to rush into the room.

  “What’s going on here?” one of the nurses demanded to know.

  “He woke up.”

  “I woke up,” Zeke agreed with a smirk.

  “That’s a good thing, at least. Let’s get a look at you and then you two can chat until you get tired of it.” One of the nurses stayed behind and started to do a quick exam.

  “How long was I out?” Zeke groaned as his wound was touched as a part of the procedure.

  “A few days. You lost a lot of blood. You needed a transfusion.”

  “The Red Cross came through.” Tristan nodded. “Someone matching your type had just donated before you got shot.”

  “Nice fresh blood. That’s great.”

  “You sound like a vampire.”

  “Hey, you can’t fault fresh blood.”

  Tristan shook his head. “I can’t believe you’re joking at a time like this.”

  The nurse grinned. “Him still having a sense of humor is a good thing. It’s the ones with good attitudes that heal the fastest.

  “I can either joke or wallow in self-pity. I’ll take the joking about it any day.” Zeke glanced over at the machinery that he was hooked up to.

  “How much longer do you think I’m going to be in here?” Zeke asked Tristan.

  “I don’t know. They said it shouldn’t be too long. You’re healing well. You just need to take it easy for a couple of weeks and you’ll be back on your feet. That’s what they said.”

  “They?” Zeke asked.

  “The doctors. Mostly they just come in and go on in medical speak, but I’ve tried to get some information.”

  “Did they share much?”

  “Not much. Something about not being family. They kept trying to get me to leave.”

  “My partner is my emergency contact for stuff like this.”

  “She’s been in every day.”

  “I figured as much.”

  “Several times a day.”

  “That makes perfect sense.” Zeke nodded. “That doesn’t sound too bad.”

  “Just don’t open up the wound.”

  Zeke shook his head. He decided to change the subject.

  “How long have you been here?”

  “I’ve been here the whole time.”

  “You aren’t blaming yourself, are you?”

  “Why wouldn’t I? You wouldn’t be in this mess if I hadn’t used my phone.”

  “Is that what they said?”

  “Yeah, they were tracking my phone.”

  Zeke sighed heavily. “That’s ridiculous. I should have warned you. I’m the one who knows better.”

  “It’s not that simple.” Tristan shook his head. “It was like being caught in a movie. I should have known better. That’s what happens in the movies all the time.”

  “Real life isn’t the movies, Tristan. It’s fine. I’m fine. Or at least I’m going to be fine.”

  “You better be fine.” Tristan grumped at him.

  “I think you need a good nap.”

  “I was taking one, but your waking me up was way more important.”

  Zeke laughed. “Of course. I live to make everyone’s life difficult.”

  “Pretty sure that’s me. I’m the one who’s pissed off a bunch of people I don’t even know.”

  “Did they get the whole group?” Zeke asked.

  “Yeah. That’s what they think. They’re starting to talk.”

  “Did they tell you what happened?” Zeke further asked.

  Tristan nodded. “Yeah. They came in to check on you and they were talking about it. It’s so strange.”

  “Let me guess. It was like they forgot you were in the room?”

  “Yeah, pretty much,” Tristan said, slightly laughing to himself.

  “What did they say?”

  “They were talking about how the Ocotillos had a massive shift in leadership. The old boss had been taken out and they kind of went a lot more violent and stuff.”

  “Did he just not know how to lead?” Zeke said.

  “I think so, but I don’t really know for sure. It was so weird. I hated it.” Tristan sighed heavily. “I hated hearing them talk about it. Like I wasn’t even there.”

  “They’re cops. They were just in business mode.”

  Tristan nodded. “I know. I know that. And they don’t know me from

  Adam, but there was a bunch of stuff, stuff that I felt was important. It made sense. I guess. That it all went crazy.”

  “You need to slow down a bit,” Zeke said.

  “Sorry. I’m rambling, aren’t I?”

  “Like a mad man.”

  “I’d like to be very clear that I’m not actually insane,” Tristan said.

  Zeke laughed. “I know you’re not.”

  “I doubt that some days.”

  Zeke nodded. “Don’t worry. It’ll all be fine from now on.”

  “How can you be sure about that?”

  Zeke pointed to the door. “If they thought we were still at risk, they would have put a detail on the door to keep us safe.”

  “Guards?”

  “Yeah, guards.”

  Tristan nodded, but he was chewing on his lip like he had a question he didn’t want to ask. He just tried to focus on how happy he was that Zeke was going to be okay. Even after everything, that was the most important t
hing. That Zeke was going to survive after having been shot for him.

  “They left yesterday.”

  “That means they’re wrapping it up. You should be able to go home soon.”

  “That’s good.” Tristan’s mind wasn’t on going home. It was a million miles away, somewhere else, existing on another plane of space and time.

  “Hey.” Zeke tapped Tristan on the arm.

  “Huh?” Tristan looked up at the him, pulled out of his own distraction.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing’s wrong.”

  “You don’t honestly expect me to believe that, do you?” Zeke said, looking straight into Tristan’s eyes.

  Tristan leaned back in the chair. He looked up at the ceiling instead of answering. His mind was wandering over all the things that had happened. His life had gone insane. Everything had changed. His world had changed. But one picture stuck out above them all. Zeke on the floor, barely conscious. Hurt. The blood seemed to float in front of his eyes.

  Tristan squeezed his eyes closed, trying to make his mind forget it. But it wouldn’t go away.

  “What’s wrong?” Zeke’s voice was insistent.

  “It’s nothing.”

  “The look on your face says you’re worried about something.”

  “You that good at reading faces?”

  “I guess I am.”

  Tristan sighed again. “I just keep seeing you like that.”

  “Hurt?”

  “Yeah. I can’t stop.”

  Zeke shook his head. “That’s gonna take a while. When was the last time you got a good night’s sleep?”

  “When was the last time I borrowed your bed?” Tristan had a dry laugh, the kind of sarcastic noise that told everything that needed to be said.

  “That’s what I thought.” Zeke had a concerned look on his face. Like Tristan might actually be the one hurt.

  “It’s not a big deal.”

  “It is a big deal. You’re not used to this life. And you should never have lived through it.”

  “Is this one of the reasons you became a cop?” Tristan asked.

  “No, I became a cop because I wanted to feel like I could do something. I stay because I can actually help people.”

  “Do I really help people?” Tristan said, thinking about Zeke’s words.

  “Cakes make the world a little better.”

  “Do they?”

  “Yeah, they make people happy. There’s nothing wrong with that. Not everyone is going through trouble all the time. Think of all the birthdays that you make amazing?”

  “I guess that’s a thing.”

  “There needs to be happy times in life,” Zeke explained softly. “And you bring those happy times to people. I patch the wounds in the world and you help keep some of them from happening. It’s an amazing thing.”

  “Is it?”

  “Yeah, it is. You don’t have to rethink everything that you do.” Zeke shook his head.

  “What?”

  “You keep asking if things are really true or not.”

  “There’s a lot of doubt going on right now.”

  “I can’t blame you for that.”

  Tristan looked at Zeke again, this time straight on rather than just peeking through his peripheral vision. He couldn’t help but notice how handsome Zeke was. Even injured and in the harsh light of the hospital. Even with all of the stuff that had happened. With how pale the man was. Zeke was an amazing specimen of masculinity.

  “I don’t know what to say anymore.”

  “Your life is gonna get back to normal?” Zeke told Tristan.

  “Is that a question?”

  Zeke laughed. “You need to say that. That you’re going to find your normal again.”

  “Does normal even exist anymore?” Tristan shook his head.

  “Normal can exist again.” Zeke pulled himself up to sit up more. “It really can.”

  “I’m not so sure about that.”

  “It’s so easy to doubt that. Your life just turned on its head.” Zeke looked at him carefully. “And it can be turned right side up again.”

  “Do I even want to reopen?” Tristan added.

  “Will you regret not doing it?”

  Tristan sighed and thought about it for a second. “I’m going to reopen. I have to.”

  “Why?”

  “Because that’s my life.”

  Tristan kept his eyes on the ceiling. He couldn’t look at Zeke again. “It’s my life. And they tried to take it away from me. But they didn’t. Thanks to you.”

  “I was probably more of a hassle than a help,” Zeke said to Tristan.

  “They would have at the very least kept taking my money from me. Kept hurting me. It would have been terrible. Living under that cloud.”

  Tristan shuddered at the thought of it. It had been bothering him for a while. The way his life could have turned into something that he couldn’t control. There was no way his father could have kept that secret for long.

  “And now you don’t have too.”

  “No. I don’t.”

  Tristan could feel the other man’s eyes boring holes into him like he was staring right into his soul. He shivered. “You can live the life you want now. Please, do it.”

  “I’m not sure what I want.”

  “In regard to what?”

  “What we almost had.”

  Zeke looked over at him. “I still want to consider it. Maybe after you’ve calmed down a bit.”

  Tristan nodded. “I think I’d like that too.”

  “Then why won’t you look at me?”

  “Because I really want to hug you right now, and I’m afraid that I might hurt you.”

  Zeke laughed. “That sounds like a good problem to have.”

  “Is it? Because I’m really worried about hurting you.”

  “Why don’t you just follow my lead. Come here.”

  Tristan couldn’t help but trust Zeke. Something about the man risking his life to protect him. He got up and trudged toward the bed, sitting gingerly on the edge.

  “You look like you’re about to throw up,” Zeke said.

  “I’m nervous.”

  “Just watch my left side and you’ll be fine.”

  Tristan reached over and ran his hand over Zeke’s right arm. “I can’t believe this. It still seems so unreal.”

  Zeke pulled him in for another hug.

  Tristan froze.

  “Sorry.” Zeke frowned.

  Tristan paused and rearranged his limbs to make it as gentle as humanly possible. Then he wrapped his arms around Zeke, who he fell in love with.

  Tristan had developed some deep feelings that felt a little out of control. Feelings that he hadn’t had before.

  “When do you know if something is real or just the emotional high?”

  Zeke frowned. “Give it some time. Look. We don’t have to decide anything now. We shouldn’t decide anything now.”

  “Right. You’re right.”

  “In the meantime, why don’t you lie down with me?”

  “Sure, that sounds great.” Tristan weakly smiled before curling up next to Zeke. There was barely enough room for two bodies, but they stayed close and were soon sleeping peacefully.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Zeke changed behind the curtain. After almost a week in the hospital, it was time to go home. He had gotten the reports of the Ocotillos having been taken down. The territory was empty for now but they thought it might take a bit longer to get everything cleaned up. After all, any stragglers the police had missed would naturally try to figure out what to do. There were bound to be a few guys who they hadn’t taken in, but it probably wouldn’t take them long to move on to less dangerous territory.

  Tristan would be safe. Zeke was grateful for that. He was going to have to spend some time off of work to recover and also deal with the standard procedures that came from discharging his weapon in a firefight.

  The knock on the door interrupted his thought
s.

  “Tristan?” He called out.

  “Yeah. You ready?”

  “You really meant it when you said you were going to be my ride home, didn’t you?”

  “Why wouldn’t I?”

  “I figured you would volunteer for it.”

  “Can you blame me?”

  “Come on in.” Zeke waved at the door even though Tristan couldn’t see it. “I’m decent.”

  Tristan let himself in. The man looked absolutely radiant. Happier than he’d been in days.

  “You ready to go home?” Tristan asked.

  “More than ready.”

  “You might not be so ready once you see the shape your apartment’s in.”

  “Is it that bad?”

  “It’s gonna take some work. We did a little, but we didn’t have much time.”

  Zeke laughed. “Next time, I’ll try to heal slower.”

  “So I can do all the work?”

  “I’m sure you weren’t working alone.”

  Tristan grinned widely. “No, I wasn’t. You almost ready?”

  “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

  Zeke picked up the bag. His left arm was still in the sling and would probably stay that way for a couple of weeks, but he was itching to get out of the sterile environment of the hospital. There was so much more that he could do with his time.

  “Let me get that for you.” Tristan took the bag from him before he could react.

  “Damn. I’m slowing down.”

  “You’ve been taking it easy. It’s hard to come off of a vacation.”

  “This is the worst vacation I’ve ever had.”

  “Hey, nothing wrong with having people to wait on you hand and foot.” Tristan had been gaining back his sense of humor as Zeke had healed. It was starting to feel a lot better, a natural banter that they shared now that the worries were actually starting to fade away.

  Zeke appreciated the fact that Tristan was starting to understand what was going on in his life. He had accepted that none of this was his fault. He had grown stronger and was well on the way to reopening the bakery, his employees hard at work to relaunch the place with the new donuts now available.

  “Did you bring me any donuts to test?”

  “Sorry, no. We’re getting the new fryers installed today.”

  “Let’s get moving then.” Zeke headed out. He was in a hurry. Ready to get home and flop down on the couch with some chips and a beer.