Guilty of Loving You Read online

  “Guilty of Loving You”

  M/M Gay Romance

  David Horne

  © 2020

  David Horne

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other non-commercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  This book is intended for Adults (ages 18+) only. The contents may be offensive to some readers. It may contain graphic language, explicit sexual content, and adult situations. May contain scenes of unprotected sex. Please do not read this book if you are offended by content as mentioned above or if you are under the age of 18.

  Please educate yourself on safe sex practices before making potentially life-changing decisions about sex in real life. If you’re not sure where to start, see here: http://www.jerrycoleauthor.com/safe-sex-resources/ (courtesy of Jerry Cole).

  This story is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Products or brand names mentioned are trademarks of their respective holders or companies. The cover uses licensed images and are shown for illustrative purposes only. Any person(s) that may be depicted on the cover are simply models.

  Edition v1.00 (2020.10.26)

  http://www.DavidHorneauthor.com

  Special thanks to the following volunteer readers who helped with proofreading: Bob, RB, Big Kidd, Naomi W., Blue Savannah and those who assisted but wished to be anonymous. Thank you so much for your support.

  Table of Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter One

  Craig normally loved his job. He had a huge passion for it, and he liked to think he was making a difference by ensuring those kids were safe with people who loved them. But there were times when he really didn’t want to be at work. Much like today.

  He had been called every name under the sun, accused of things that made Craig’s skin crawl, and even propositioned from across the courtroom. There had been yet another brawl that broke out when he ruled in favor of parents against an older couple suing for grandparents’ rights. They had no case from the start, but they still thought they were entitled to everything. The grandmother had been the worst, and her screeches about her babies being taken away were still ringing in Craig’s ears.

  It was times like this when he was glad, he wasn’t married anymore. His ex-mother-in-law was a real bitch. She saw him as being below her because he had steered her doting son away from women. Craig didn’t think he could roll his eyes any further given her denial that her only son was gay.

  Some people were just not to be reasoned with.

  “Tough morning?”

  Craig looked around, still in the process of taking off his robes. A petite, college-aged young woman with dyed purple hair cut into a pixie bob that clashed with her black blouse and pants stood by his desk with a sympathetic smile. He hadn’t even heard her come in. Showed how exhausted he was. Craig scowled.

  “You had to ask, didn’t you?”

  “Always.”

  Craig growled as he shrugged his robes off and hung them up.

  “There are times when I regret hiring you as my secretary, Zoe. You’re still stuck in that college mindset. It’s like having a teenager working for me.”

  “You wouldn’t be able to cope without me, Uncle Craig.”

  That was the problem. Craig couldn’t. He could do his job without any problem, but when it came to everything else, Craig seemed to struggle. It was like he couldn’t get his mind out of work as quickly as he should. Things just bothered him too much. His sister’s kid had been looking for a job and, being a dutiful uncle, Craig had agreed to let her intern for him. Six months later, and Zoe had a permanent job with him after his last secretary retired. She kept him on top of everything and was very prompt with his demands.

  Craig really would be stuck without her. But he wasn’t about to admit it out loud to someone twenty years his junior. He headed to his desk and slumped into it with a heavy sigh, staring at the ceiling.

  “What’s on this afternoon again? More chaos like this morning?”

  “Mostly hearings, with a ruling on the Trench-Croker case last thing today.” Zoe looked at the planner in her hand. “You do have one change from what I told you this morning. It’s an emergency custody hearing for the Wilson-Crosbie case. Ms. Crosbie is concerned about her children’s welfare after the police raided her ex’s home when he had visitation this weekend. Their hearing isn’t for another couple of months, so this was only put in by her attorney about an hour ago.”

  Craig sighed. Alex Wilson and Alice Crosbie. That had been a match made in hell. He had never seen a man who refused to grow up and thought he could get anything just by snapping his fingers. The ex-wife had been beaten down by him and had managed to get the courage to leave him, taking their children with her. Because they were his children as well, Wilson got partial custody. There was an agreement in place that Wilson’s side of the family argued about every time they were in court, while Alice Crosbie stuck firm with her decisions. She was very calm and collected, although Craig could see she was close to breaking down when her former in-laws started in on her. Craig had got to the point where he needed to keep a court officer close to her just in case they tried to go for her. No one was getting past the officer Craig assigned to her.

  He had seen a lot of messes in family court. This certainly ranked as one of the worst, but Craig had given visitation to the father because, without physical proof and until the psychologist’s reports came back, he couldn’t deny that. Wilson got the children every other weekend and one day in the week until all the reports came back. From what Craig had heard, most of the family refused to do the psychological reports to show they were well enough to be around the pre-teens. It was one big fuck-up.

  Now they had been raided. That was all Craig needed.

  “What did they get raided for?”

  “The call was initially for drugs, but then the cops found a lot of unregistered handguns in the house. All of them out in the open where the kids could get hold of them.” Zoe looked uncomfortable. “The youngest of theirs is only eight. He was playing with an unloaded gun when the cops arrived.”

  Craig’s stomach dropped. Fuck! This was worse than he thought. When he had given the visitation, he had given everyone the rules everyone had to abide by. Everyone had to be drug-free, no drinking and certainly no firearms. That was at the top of his list, and everyone involved in this case had agreed. Now they had been raided for drugs and guns? He was floored that they would think nobody would have gotten hurt if that gun had been loaded.

  “Where is Wilson now?”

  “He’s out on bail, but it’s not the first time he’s been arrested for drugs, according to his ex-wife. It was one of the main reasons she left him.”

  Craig had read about the drugs charges, which was why he had ordered Wilson to have unscheduled drug tests so he stayed clean and he wasn’t left unsupervised with his children. His own mother had offered to have the supervised visits at her house where he was staying, which hadn’t pleased her ex-daughter-in-law much. Now Wilson had thrown that out the window.

  There was no way Craig was awarding him any kind of custody after breaking the custody agreement he laid out for them.
>
  “Where are the kids now?”

  “Back with Ms. Crosbie after the cops called her.” Zoe was not looking happy, either. “She wants to keep them away for good but her former in-laws are harassing her and calling her every name under the sun, threatening with more court action if she keeps them away.”

  “When are they scheduled on my docket?”

  “Immediately after lunch. It was the only time I could fit them in.”

  “Have you got the papers needed?”

  Zoe nodded.

  “Of course. They’re on my desk.”

  “Good. Bring them in. Then be a sweetheart and get my lunch.” Craig rubbed his hands over his face with a sigh. “I’ll have to eat at my desk while I look over everything.”

  “Again.” Zoe muttered.

  “Not all the time.”

  “At least ten times in the last three weeks, and then I didn’t have any fingers left.” Zoe frowned at him. “You need to get up and move around, Uncle Craig. You don’t want to get sick again.”

  Craig rolled his eyes.

  “I’m perfectly fine, Zoe. It’s been more than five years since I was hospitalized. I’m not going to get sick.”

  Although sick was an understatement. If he hadn’t gone into the hospital with suspected pneumonia, the doctors would never have found the blood clots in his lungs. Being told that he had four of them dotted through both lungs and he could have dropped dead at any moment was enough to make anyone go cold. But Craig had gone through the treatment, taken the medication, and six months after, he was given the all-clear. Now he was careful about how long he stayed sitting, and he kept himself moving. Swimming and running had become part of his regime now, and it had certainly improved his health, if anything. Lewis had certainly appreciated it.

  For a while. Just not in the last eighteen months. If he did, he wouldn’t have started sucking other men’s cocks.

  “It’s a good thing the court officers don’t see you jogging around your office until you’re dizzy whenever you escape to chambers to look over papers.” Zoe giggled. “That would cause a stir, seeing your robes flying out behind you like a bird in flight.”

  “Don’t you have anything better to do, Zoe? I didn’t hire you to make comments like that.”

  “I suppose I’ll get those papers for that emergency hearing and then I’ll go and fetch lunch.” Zoe turned toward the door. “You want your usual?”

  “Please.”

  Craig rested his elbows on the desk, rubbing at his temples. He was starting to get another headache. He loved his work, but just thinking about the number of ways he had witnessed that could - and did - screw up a kid in the middle of a custody battle gave him a migraine. These kids sometimes didn’t have anyone on their side. Craig liked to think he was doing everything in their best interests, keeping them at the forefront of all the mess.

  But sometimes it didn’t feel like enough. It felt like an uphill struggle, and Craig had no idea how he could change it around to make it better.

  Lewis had told him he couldn’t change everyone and it wasn’t all on him. However, Craig saw it differently. He had the ability to change a child’s life by keeping them safe. Sometimes, he wasn’t able to do that as neither parent was fit, but he did his fucking best to make sure the best outcome was achieved. It was like his mission in life.

  If only Lewis had understood that. His ex-husband worked in criminal court and dealt with more bad people and everything was black and white for him. He hadn’t taken kindly to Craig throwing himself into his job once he had the black robes. It was the cause of many arguments, but it wasn’t until Lewis cheated on him and then walked out of his life that Craig realized Lewis was jealous because Craig was doing better than him. Lewis hated it when someone took the limelight off him. As a top-notch prosecutor, he was always on the front page for another high-profile case, but he couldn’t become a judge, something that was his dream. Yet Craig had that job, and Lewis had been pissed.

  The bastard was always so resentful when he didn’t get his own way. Craig had never noticed until right at the end. At least he and Lewis had never followed through on their conversations about adopting. That would certainly have been messy, and Craig wasn’t about to bring children into the mess that had been his marriage.

  He wouldn’t have called him a good choice at that point.

  The door to his office opened and closed, and then there were soft footsteps coming across the carpet. Craig didn’t look up as they stopped by his desk.

  “Just put them down on the desk, Zoe. I’ll have a look at them in a moment.”

  “Zoe’s already gone.”

  Craig sat up straight when he heard that deep voice. The one that made him feel like someone was brushing their fingers across the back of his neck. A tall and well-proportional male was standing next to his desk with a file in his hands. He was dressed in the attire of a court bailiff, the uniform looking snug on his muscular frame. Craig had spent many hours since the other man had been transferred to his court wondering what he looked like without that shirt on. It had certainly fulfilled many of his fantasies.

  Not now. Eye-candy will have to wait.

  “Alistair. I mean, Officer Hanson.” Why did he have to sound like a flustered teenager? “I didn’t realize it was you.”

  “Obviously.” Alistair said wryly. He arched a dark eyebrow. “Tough morning, wasn’t it?”

  “You could say that again.” Craig stayed sitting forward. If he sat back, Alistair would get a clear view of Craig’s erection pressing against the zipper of his pants. Not exactly appropriate, but unavoidable whenever Alistair was around. “I’ll be glad when today’s over. What are you doing in here, anyway?”

  “I was on my way to see you as Zoe was coming out. I offered to bring this in.” Alistair held up the file. “Zoe said it would give her a few extra minutes getting to the front of the queue at your favorite sandwich place.”

  “She makes it sound like it’s a dog-eat-dog situation there.”

  “I’ve been there. On its busier days, I’d certainly call it that.” Alistair frowned. “Ms. Hennessy and her client are out in the hall. Along with the client’s mother. They want to speak with you.”

  Craig groaned. Not them again. Jake Dolman had applied for full custody from his ex-wife Tamara Meldrew, at the insistence of his mother. It was clear that Sarah Dolman was behind all of this. She was the driving force. Jake was the one with the history of abuse and yet he thought he deserved full custody of his six-year-old twins. His ex had done the right thing leaving him.

  Craig had already had three separate hearings about this case, and he had looked through the evidence. He was due to give his final verdict tomorrow, and he already knew what it was going to be. But until then, he wasn’t discussing that with anyone. Not even Alistair, although he could certainly trust the bailiff to keep his mouth shut on things like that. Nothing Dolman could tell him right now was going to change his mind. The man had tried to manipulate his way through it all with his mother’s urgings, and Craig wasn’t about to be played.

  “I’m not discussing anything with them regarding the custody of Dolman’s children. If they want to have their say, they can have it in court when I give my verdict.”

  “That’s what I told them, but they were insistent.” Alistair tilted his head to the side, his chocolate-brown eyes regarding Craig curiously. “I take it you’ve already made your decision on this, then?”

  “Damn right I have.” Craig scowled. “And Ms. Hennessy knows better than to try and speak to me with her clients. I won’t entertain it.”

  “Understood.”

  “You know all this, so why did you come in, anyway?”

  Alistair watched him silently for a moment. Then he shrugged.

  “I suppose I had nothing better to do right now.”

  They stared at each other. Craig could feel something crackling in the air. It was making his pulse skitter around. What was it about Alistair Hanson that got
him so distracted and put him on such an uneven keel? Not even Lewis made Craig feel like this. His ex-husband was something else, certainly. Alistair was just...something. Craig still hadn’t figured it out yet.

  “Would you like me to throw them out of the courthouse?” Alistair asked.

  “What? Oh.” Craig shook himself. “Absolutely. I’m not having them step foot in my chambers.”

  “I’ll deal with that now, Judge Harvey.” Alistair flashed him that lazy smile of his that had his eyes glinting. “You leave it to me.”

  Craig wished he wouldn’t look at him like that. Officer Hanson was far more trouble than he was worth. He tried not to look at the man as he walked away, wishing he would stop staring at the way the man’s pants hugged his ass. He really did look good in that uniform.

  God, he really needed to get out more if he was drooling over his court officers.

  ***

  Alistair tried his best not to look over his shoulder as he left Craig’s office. He could feel the other man’s eyes on him, but if he turned around, there was a good chance he might not leave the office. And Alistair enjoyed his job too much to jeopardize it.

  Why did the judge he now worked for have to be this handsome? There had to be a rule against judges being so good-looking. Alistair had been relieved to get away from Judge Manford, the old-fashioned biased bastard getting on his nerves. He certainly didn’t like Alistair and kept making comments about Alistair. He had now been forced into retirement after one mistake too many on his previous cases, and Alistair had been moved. Hoping for a liberal judge was something Alistair believed was wishful thinking.

  Then he had caught sight of Craig Harvey, and all the air had left his lungs. Barely five-ten, Craig commanded a presence that was far greater. Lean but full of compact muscle, his dark hair always seemed to be unruly as if he were constantly running his fingers through the thick locks. His neatly trimmed beard seemed to be already turning silver, and silver flecks were appearing in his hair. Alistair did like a salt-and-pepper look on a man.